Or… How Shall We Then Forgive? Part 6

So Father God wants to protect us from the incredible danger of hate and revenge. And also, when you forgive bad actors they don’t necessarily improve. So what do we do about that danger? I’m glad you’re asking this vital question. Here’s what Jesus had to say about relating to our enemies:

“Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.” (Luke 6:27-28)

Love. Do good. Bless. Pray.

Jesus calls us to imitate the Father and keep to the high road, even when others are taking the low road. Or as Michelle Obama famously quipped: “When they go low, we go high.”

Notice, however, what’s not on the list: trust. God does not ask us to trust or be emotionally intimate with those who are hostile to us. There is a profound difference between sacrificial love and emotional intimacy. God Himself makes this distinction as He relates to human beings. Let me illustrate:

“He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.” (Matthew 5:45) “The Lord is good to all, and His mercy is over all that He has made.” (Psalm 145:9) “For God so loved the world, that He gave His one and only Son” (John 3:16) “But God demonstrates His own love to us is this: while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” (Romans 5:8) 

And also…

“To the faithful You show Yourself faithful, to the blameless You show Yourself blameless, to the pure You show Yourself pure, but to the devious You show Yourself shrewd.” (2 Samuel 22:26-27) “For the Lord detests a perverse man but takes the upright into His confidence.” (Proverbs 3:32) “The Lord confides in those who fear Him.” (Psalm 25:14) “But Jesus would not entrust Himself to them, for He knew all men… He knew what was in man.” (John 2:24-25)

Can you see it? The indiscriminate sacrificial love of God and also (as we might call them in modern psychological terms) the personal boundaries based on an assessment of character?

Realize that it can be very messy and complicated teasing out how to embody this in specific situations. As I write I am imagining a myriad of particular painful circumstances that I know are on the other side of my screen. There is no way I can break it down for everyone’s specific needs. Words fail me here. What I want you to know is that if you can’t figure it out on your own, it’s OK. These are the kinds of questions that are great to sit down and sort through with a trusted counselor who has taken the time to listen well to all the nuances and particularities of your story.

But I hope the distinction between love and intimacy helps.