I frequently have ruminating thoughts. Sometimes they become verbal. Nate, thinking I am talking to him, will ask me what I said. At which point, I own up: “Never mind, I was just talking to myself.”

I’ve learned to joke about this quirk I have. I saw this truly fantastic mug that said, “I talk to myself because sometimes I need expert advice.” That’s a good spin. On a more serious note, maybe it’s the combination of being a verbal processor and an introvert. That’s a tough combination, I find. You’re free to chuckle at me, whether you can relate or not. And if you can relate, I hope I help you feel slightly more normal.

The truth is, I’m not really talking to myself. There’s always an audience larger than myself of other humans for whom I have thoughts. And sometimes I feel guilty about that because I think, “I should be talking to God, not human beings who aren’t here!” And while there’s some truth to that (can any of us claim we pray enough?), after well nigh over a decade of trying the shame approach with no significant reduction in ruminating thoughts, I’ve decided to try a different tactic. It occurred to me: what if the thoughts aren’t going away, because I’m actually supposed to share them with other people? What if there’s a creative purpose here?

And hence, I blog.